My Garden

CW: Animal death.

I recently had to help a sick stray cat in my community end its suffering and cross the rainbow bridge. His name was Stripey, and he was kind of a jerk, but I still loved him, despite his aggression when I tried to pet him. He’s not the first cat I’ve helped in this way, and sadly, I know even the healthy cats won’t live forever.

I had the vet cremate him. When the remains are back there for pickup, I’ll bring him to the garden on my patio. I think putting the remains in the garden are a good balance between keeping him close and letting go. He can return to the earth in the place that the cats like to hang out and feel safe, loved, and fed. It’s what I did with Sweetpea and Momma Cat before, too.

Many of the plants are misfits and strays in their own right. I have basil plants grown from stems obtained when getting pho at Vietnamese restaurants. I have onions of various types bought for cooking and planted when my ADHD left them to their own devices, sending up greens to photosynthesize and call out for my attention. A mint plant from friends that moved and couldn’t bring it. Other ‘volunteers’ from seeds of things I left to decompose.

I try to keep things alive the best I can. I cry hard when I fail. But I’m working on accepting that I can’t do everything.

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